Surviving as ‘The Other Woman’

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Being ‘the other woman’ can be difficult.  Here’s how to survive it.

Are you in a relationship with a man who is married to someone else?  That makes you ‘the other woman’.  Being the other woman more often than not ends in heartbreak, so on that note I encourage you to end it now.  However, you may have already fallen in love and you don’t know where to go from here.  Being in a relationship with a married man is a lot different than a regular relationship.  Here are some tips to help you survive as ‘the other woman’.

  • Prepare to be Judged

Telling your friends that you are dating a married man may not go over so well.  Dating a married man is a controversial subject.  Some people may call you immoral, greedy, or just a plain out b**ch.  You must prepare yourself to be judged by people that are close to you.  Just make sure you don’t allow yourself to get too upset by these comments.  You know why you’re in the relationship and really – that’s all that matters.

  • It’s Exciting, But…

I haven’t dated a married man, but I have friends who have.  The consensus is – that married men often have a lot of pent up sexual energy which makes for an amazing time in bed for you, the other woman.  Because he’s in a new relationship, he may be extremely romantic and attentive.  However, part of this is also because he’s doing something his wife doesn’t know about.  Part of the fun for him may be the thrill of not getting caught, and he’s playing this game at the expense of your emotions.  Be careful.

  • Set Boundaries

Because he is married, he will want to set the rules in the relationship – otherwise he risks his wife finding out.  While this is true, and secrecy is part of being the other woman, make sure you get to set some rules too.  And if he’s going home to a wife – you should definitely date other men.  This will help you keep perspective on the relationship you have, and maybe you’ll find a single man to date instead of this married on.

  • No, He’s not going to Leave

Chances are he is telling you he wants to leave his wife.  This rarely happens.  Don’t build up your hopes of a happy-ever-after with this man.  Keep a realistic outlook.  Leaving a spouse is complicated and it will probably never happen.

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